In traditional straight weddings, the best man and chief bridesmaid play major roles in helping to organise events beforehand and are especially important on the wedding day. With civil partnership ceremonies, there are fewer years of tradition to fall back on, but many people are still opting to have a Best Man, Maid of Honour, and we have heard from someone asked to be the Best Woman (which we love!) so picking that special person to help you out is really important. Someone that you have partied with for ten years may be your closest confidant, but if they are unreliable, pick someone else. You need to be able to trust that person to deal with critical matters both in the lead up and on the day.
Don’t be offended if the first person you ask declines your invitation, it’s a lot to ask of someone, especially if that person dislikes being in the limelight.
How much you involve people in your wedding planning is up to you, not them!
The extent to which you involve family and loved ones in your wedding planning depends on your relationship with them, and how much they support your relationship and decision to formalise your partnership. Generally people love to help, but if you are worried that they will interfere or take over, think hard before you ask them to do something.
On the other hand, giving particular tasks to those eager to join in can take the pressure off you, but be sure to give clear instructions if it’s something you care a great deal about. If you don’t already have it, the lead up to the wedding will hone your ability to delegate!
Choosing the right gay-friendly wedding professionals
Choosing the right professionals is even more important. The Gay Wedding Organizer e-book has been created to help you ensure you have thought about everything before making final decisions, but also most importantly, only contains suppliers that are proud to be gay-friendly. Don’t be afraid to take a little time after meeting a supplier to make your choice if you need to, but when you are certain, book as soon as you can, especially if it’s to be a summer wedding – your favourite florist may already be taking bookings eighteen months in advance.
The more you tell your wedding suppliers, the more they know about what you want, and they will have all kinds of advice from their extensive experience. With the best suppliers, it becomes a sort of partnership – they can understand and share your vision of what you want, and do all they can to provide it – but only if you tell them!
