If you've read our About Page, you already know that the original printed version of the Gay Wedding Organizer was launched all those years ago because we had heard horror stories about the treatment of gay couples by prejudiced wedding suppliers.
I have personally spoken to several gay couples who have told me about how poorly they've been treated and I discussed this issue in a recent interview with Gino Meriano. He said:
"I'm so glad you ask that, because there are some people who can't believe that it is needed, but homophobia is still there, even after all these years of civil partnership ceremonies, and it is definitely present in the traditional wedding industry. I've been to straight wedding fayres and exhibited as Pink Weddings, the abuse from exhibitors and visitors was incredible."
I'm an optimistic person (on a good day) and I like to think that life for gay people in Britain is getting better. However, a recent conversation with Sharon at Best Dress 2 Impress has brought this back to the forefront of our minds.
Sharon is one of the latest wedding business owners to advertise with The Gay Wedding Organizer, and she told us how several of her customers have experienced poor treatment prior to finding her.
The first thing she told us about was this: "A lesbian couple told me that they went into a bridal shop to look for dresses together and in the end had to 'pretend' that they were a bride and her best friend looking for dresses as the shop assistants made them feel so uncomfortable. They felt embarrassed and left."
This makes me furious – and so upset for the couple involved. Have you had any similar experiences?
Sharon went on to tell us about another incident involving a gay man who wanted to enquire about dresses, but as soon as he opened his mouth the shop assistant said that she didn't serve men.
Sharon said this in an e-mail to me this week and I couldn't agree more: "In my mind this is just outrageous as you shouldn't refuse to serve a person based on colour, creed, gender etc; but this is still happening frequently. Only last week I had a text from a lovely man who had obviously been treated badly and he also wants a dress but explained that he 'understood' if I did not want to deal with him. My response was ' when would you like to visit me and try on a few gowns?' I'm also helping him with corsets, stockings and a veil!"
All I can say is thank goodness he found Sharon.
We have to do something about this!
I have a plan brewing in my heart, one that will need a lot of input from you, dear readers. First, I want to hear about your experiences – both good and bad. This isn't to name and shame, but to bring your experiences out into the open so we can see what is really happening out there in wedding land.
• Have you ever been made to feel uncomfortable when approaching a wedding company?
• Have you ever been treated differently once the supplier has discovered you're arranging a civil partnership ceremony and celebration?
• Have you had any experiences similar to the ones Sharon told me about?
Please do let us know in the comments. This is really important; we have the opportunity to not only talk about it, but also tell the industry what needs to change. Let's make that happen.
I would dearly like to visit Sharon (but I am not getting married nor am I gay but I love cross dressing.
There must be many of us out there.
Thanks Sharon
Jean
Luckily I have not experienced this as yet (touch wood) but would like to report the opposite. With our venue, they gave us a contract to sign and the places for our signatures said Bride and Groom. When we pointed this out to them, they were mortified and changed it on the spot. So well done, Stanley House Hotel, Mellor Brook, Lancs xx
Hi John, yes, I think there are probably lots of people who cross dress, and maybe one day people will be able to walk into a shop and buy a dress of any kind, for whatever purpose, without any judgements made whatsoever.
Wendy, I am so pleased to hear that! Hooray!