Joe's Diary: Outfits for the Ceremony

The Grooms and Male Attendants


Well, this is where we have an important decision to make, and there are no traditions here to follow yet!


Basically, we can go for matching, co-ordinating or totally different outfits. I've seen great examples of all three. I think for us, seeing as we are such different heights, it may be better to avoid the exact match option. I quite like the idea of having a common theme, perhaps we could have matching cravats and waistcoats but different style cuts on the jacket so that our shapes are flattered individually. We could also have that colour match the theme of the invites and decorations etc so that it all ties in together.


There are a number of options, as ever. Pete is quite keen on having a designer suit, maybe even one specially tailored for him. It would look wonderful with a silk tie to match the colour theme. It would be very contemporary as a style though, and I'm not sure it will work with the rest of everything if we go for the more traditional classic wedding style.


I'm more keen on us and the other attendants wearing something more traditional such as a frockcoat or morning suit. They look elegant and are very flattering - they can disguise beer bellies very well! Waistcoats and cravats really make it all look very special - when else do blokes look that smart and aristocratic? Some people go for canes, top hats and gloves - the works. I can carry a top hat but I'll leave it up to Pete in the end, that may be too much and if someone looks ridiculous in a hat it's silly to force them to wear it as they'll just be embarrassed and awkward all day.


In America it's more acceptable to wear black tie as an alternative, but it's much less popular over here, and I wouldn't want to feel like I was going to a ball rather than my wedding day.


Basically we need to go to the specialist hire shops that I've seen in my Organizer and try on lots of things. We don't have to worry about not seeing each other's outfit before the day so it will be nice to discuss our options together. We need to sort it out as early as possible as it's a summer wedding.


We're going to hire all the male attendant outfits from the same place as that way we're more likely to get a discount that way. As some of our Ushers live quite a long way away we can get their measurements and place an order for them with a fitting closer to the wedding, or if it is one of the bigger suppliers they may have an outlet close to their home towns.


We must remember the shoes too. No point having dapper outfits if they all turn up in their scuffed work shoes! Hiring may be the best way to make sure that they are all smart and suitable.


I must admit that this is the only time I've wished Pete was in the armed forces, then he could wear full dress uniform on the day!  We'd still have to arrange the clothes for the other attendants though.


My cousin had a pageboy at her wedding, he was dressed in a miniature version of what the men were wearing. We thought it looked very cute, but she has since confessed to me that they'd tried to get him to wear a more traditional pageboy outfit and he'd thrown such a tantrum about it they gave up! I suppose a wilful child is one less thing we have to worry about!


The Bridesmaids


Katie and I had a good laugh about this the other day. When we were teenagers, the fashion was for all bridesmaids to wear the same style, no matter whether it suited them or not (she has some photos of her looking utterly miserable in frilly peach at a family wedding!). Katie's bridesmaids are lucky that things are much more relaxed now, and it's perfectly acceptable for them to wear different styles as long as there is some theme running through them, the same fabric and colour for example.


As her four are all such radically different shapes this is definitely the way forwards,  even though we lose comedy potential! Katie was talking to a dressmaker the other day and she said that sometimes it is possible to find a style that can just be gently adapted for each shape - for example, a slightly different neckline and/or hemline for each dress.


Katie has managed it all very well, she had a girly night in and talked it over with them all together. She's being very considerate and not imposing her ideas on them too much as she wants them to have a lovely day too. They're happy that they have choice over the style, and they agreed that the best thing to do is to go to a bridal shop and start putting them in different dresses to see what suits them best. Guess who was roped in for the male opinion? We agreed that specialist outlets may be able to cater for different styles in the same fabric, if not she'll have to look into getting a dressmaker. I drew the line at giving opinions on the lingerie! The shops or the dressmaker will be able to help them to pick the right styles, if some go for fitted bodices they may not need much anyway.


Katie is trying to rope in the neighbour's little girl to being a flower girl because she saw the cutest outfit in a magazine of one dressed like a fairy princess. I told her that she can handle that by herself!



Mothers


We have a total of three as Pete's stepmother will be there too so it's even more important that we make sure that they tell us which colour they are going for as soon as possible so there are no clashes. Mum is keen to know what the others are wearing as she is paranoid about turning up in the same outfit as them!


I'm going to take her to the specialist outlets in my Organizer as they will be able to advise not only on which style will suit her best and what type of underwear is needed, but will also be able to help with a hat and shoes too. A hat is no longer obligatory at a wedding, and there are some remarkably creative hair accessories that add a bit of sparkle or feathers that set off an outfit just as well.


She'll need to decide if she wants to wear it for other occasions, if so it may be best to get something more simple and wear a spectacular hat to make it special for the day.


It may be best to hire the hat if she's only going to wear it once, but it's up to her. I'm sure she'll want to have a hat trimmed in the same fabric.

I'm going to make sure she doesn't go mad with the shoes - she'll be on her feet a lot of the day and so comfort is really important. She's assured me that she's going to wear them around the house before the day so they're broken in a bit.


'Going Away'


We're going to wear our wedding outfits for the whole day and well into the evening reception so that all of the guests will get a chance to see us all dressed up. We're considering having lighter suits for the dancing as if we go for the full frockcoat and waistcoat option it may just be too hot.


Going away outfits can be something that a lot of thought is put into, especially if the destination is a romantic honeymoon hotel. We may be a bit more relaxed as we are starting the honeymoon proper when we get abroad - it seems a bit odd to buy a special outfit to drive to an airport hotel. Saying that, we want to dress smartly for the flight so that we have a better chance of getting an upgrade!


We just need to make sure that anything we want to change into is kept in a safe and accessible place. The toastmaster will announce us leaving, and that's when I we'll have our big send off. My cousin said that it took them hours to wind down from the excitement of the day even though they were exhausted! Katie has warned us not to get worried if we feel a bit flat once it's all over as it's only natural. I'll just be glad to lie on a beach and not be writing any more lists!


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